Search and Rescue Mission

I so look forward to my annual check up (or at least getting it out of the way). Nothing has been new in years. As a matter of fact I am counting the days until a doctor will agree to permanently block any swimmers from entering my ocean (if you know what I mean). In the mean time I am sporting an IUD, the copper coil to be exact. Every year since I have had it in the conversation with the doctor has been the same.

“How is everything going?”

“Good”

“Oh, here is the string, everything looks good. See ya next year.”

I just took her word for it. I have never seen it or felt it so I just assumed that it was something that only people with MD at the end of their name could see. Much like only children can see their imaginary friends, but I believe they can see them because I had one as a child and “The Clown” was REAL.

Well today, there was no string. She asked me if I noticed anything that looked strange coming out. I told her “No, I’ve seen a few strange looking things go in but nothing strange came out”. Keep in mind I said this with the utmost honesty and completely straight thoughtful expression and it wasn’t until after I said it that I realized how it sounded. She started laughing hysterically and once she caught her breath, told me that I would need to get an Ultra Sound done so the string/IUD could be located.

The irony of me being the lucky one to get a playful IUD, I guess it got bored.